Captain John McIntyre: Yeah! Can you name the movie quote words that have been replaced by the title of the movie it appears in*? “It's no contest: neither one of you. One of the most commercially and critically successful series in American television history, M*A*S*H is — to quote its lead character, Hawkeye Pierce — "finest kind". I knew you had a-- had an attraction for Hot Lips Houlihan. Hawkeye Pierce: No sir, no, I didn't steal it. Honeycutt (Mike Farrell) is devastated when a letter from home relates how his baby daughter called a visiting Radar "Daddy." But you really put me off. MASH 4077 Quotes. I don't think Hot Lips satisfied him. And then when he died, they did an autopsy, and they found out that he was a raving queen. Hotlips O'Houlihan: I wonder how such a degenerated person ever reached a position of authority in the Army Medical Corps. Col. Blake Duke Hawkeye. . Discover and share Mash Radar Quotes. But we're putting whoever's in command on report for yet again not managing to stitch together any kind of cast commentary, interviews, or archival goodies. Colonel Blake: Well, I had planned to name Trapper Chief Surgeon, to consult on your shift and Frank's. You see, I had this friend. Hawkeye: War isn't Hell. The most pivotal personnel change is the departure of Gary Burghoff, the only ensemble member to have appeared in the original film, as Radar. Frank, were you on this religious kick at home, or did you crack up over here? : I wasn't gonna fool around out here because I got these three girls I'm engaged to back home. Duke: I'm kind of partial to blonde myself. 1. - Hawkeye Pierce. "Stand firm, strike hard. 576 total quotes View Quote (Father Mulcahy comes into the company clerk's office wearing a dress) Mulcahy : Sir, I must protest the rash of mindless pranks being perpetrated around here! boom! That lesson one? Capt. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince Quotes, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 Quotes, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 Quotes. And this friend only pretended to like … Colonel Blake: Hot Lips, you incredible nincompoop! No food. Frank Burns: Keep your filthy mouth to yourself. Old Painless is what we call the, ah, "best equipped dentist in the army". Fool! I think maybe ol' Walt's going on into the unknown to do a little recon work for us all. And he had, on an average, uh about a hundred and twenty, a hundred and thirty foals every year. The sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes. Colonel Blake: What the hell's gotten into you? Here! I'm going to go back to my bed, I'm going to put away the best part of a bottle of scotch... and under normal circumstances, you being normally what I would call a very attractive woman, I would have invited you … Besides she's-- I'll bet she's not a real blonde. I'm wearing glasses, for God's sake! Hawkeye Pierce: Morning Frank. Best Tv Shows Best Shows Ever Favorite Tv Shows Movies And Tv Shows Tv Quotes Movie Quotes David Ogden Stiers Mash 4077 Hogans Heroes F*** Yeah, M*A*S*H! Hawkeye: I don't know. Include me in one of your little bull sessions? Duke: No, I mean, what were you doing? Baby we're gonna see some stitching like you never saw before. The sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes. Bring me some sex. [watching old home movies] That's Milt Jaffe, the gynecologist from next door. No, no, no, that one. fyeahmash Bring me that one over there. Painless: Your f***in' head is coming right off, pal. Take her clothes off! Hawkeye Pierce: I don't know, I think it's one of those Ladies' things. [She stomps off]. Hawkeye Pierce: Frank Burns has gone nuts! Trapper: Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. With Alan Alda, Wayne Rogers, Loretta Swit, Jamie Farr. Hawkeye: How dare you say that about an officer of the United States Army! Hawkeye: I'm Dr. Jekyll, actually. Al Houlihan: Well, that gal is the best thing that ever happened to me. "My fist is always the right answer for the dark questions." “Anyone who needs psychiatry is sick in the head.” Being the cliche stick-in-the-mud military officer, … Sex. No booze. I mean you're what we call a regular army clown. Judson: Bastard, 88, called me a coon. But a child can do their own thing at any level. . Duke Forrest: What's going on, Frank? Duke: Go to hell, Captain Pierce. Would you say that she was a moaner, Frank? Don't let him kiss you, Hawkeye. All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz). Captain John McIntyre: I hate to ask what's on the other side. Ezekiel Bradbury 'Me Lay' Marston IV: Who are you guys? Here are some famous 'MASH' quotes from the TV show. 2021. Uh, nobody ordered Walt to go on this mission. How's that? Attention please. I think it's one of those ladies' things. Father Mulcahy: Well, what is it? Hawkeye Pierce: Frank Burns does not know his way around an operating theater, he does not know his way around a body, and if you will have observed anything, you will have observed that Major Frank Burns... is an idiot. That lesson one? Hawkeye: You have yourself a bet, sir. Trapper John: Here! Hawkeye: She can't even get out of the door. Duke: [To Hawkeye] Is there some reason I shouldn't know which hospital? Colonel Blake: Ever since the dark days before Pearl Harbor, I have been proud to wear this uniform. Quotes.net. Edit Tab 1 Hero Select 1.1 Original 1.2 Dragon Armor 2 Hero Move 3 Hero Skill 4 Hero Ult 5 Hero Death "Everyone has a beast within." I knew you had a-- had an attraction for Hot Lips Houlihan. Something tells me I've seen her someplace before. Let's give him a sexy scar, huh? Trapper John: Well, what's the matter with her today? Trapper: I don't know. Web. Hawkeye: I knew it! Hot Lips: That man is a prisoner of war, Doctor. Click on any quote below to see it in context and find out where it falls on Shmoop's pretentious scale. Take her clothes off and bring her to me. I never expected the son of a bitch to get up! Judson: [Sung for Painless] Suicide is painless / it brings on many changes / and I can take or leave it / if I please ... TV Quotes Movie Forums. Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce: Oh, that's handy. I've got glasses. I was just curious. The show ran on CBS from 1972 to 1983, seven years longer than The Korean War during which it takes place. Quotes from the Movie MASH. And it's your fault. You know, was she... Hawkeye Pierce: No Frank, you know, is she better than self-abuse? Hawkeye: That's what we award our highest medals for. You know I damn near puke every time I look at her. Duke Forrest: Dammit, Henry, Frank Burns is a menace! I want sex. You know I damn near puke every time I look at her. 26 Apr. I've eaten so much fish, I'm ready to grow gills! Cpl. Don't let him kiss you, Hawkeye! Announcer: Attention, all base members must report for a drug test for marij- marijua-... disregard last transmission. Goddamn army. Get him off me! Trapper John: I dunno. Heard from your wife? I am the pro from Dover, and this is my favorite caddy. Test your knowledge on this movies quiz and compare your score to others. Bring her to me. Radar: No sir, that's the one he came in. Al Houlihan: I beg your pardon? Take her clothes off and bring her to me now. Ham and eggs will all right. Duke: I'll not only say it, but I'll back it with 20 bucks. M*A*S*H (Movie) Quotes. Duke Forrest: Colonel, fair's fair... if I punch Hawkeye and nail Hot-Lips, can I go home too? Duke: Now then, y'all come here to say your final farewell to ol' Walt here. MASH quotes 44 total quotes. Trapper: Lucky your mouth wasn't open, it would have got stuck in your throat. Although the game is supposed to be taking place in a remote location of Korea in 1951, late model 1960's automobiles can be seen driving on a nearby highway as the game progresses. Oh come off it, MAJOR! Can you imagine what it feels like to walk by this tent and hear you laughing and know I'm not welcome? Duke: What's going on, Frank? "MASH Quotes." She's a bitch, look at my new flannel coat. As with past M*A*S*H sets, viewers have the preferred option of viewing the episodes without the intrusive laugh track. That man is a sex maniac; I don't think Hot Lips satisfied him. Henry Blake: Do we have enough sherry and ginger-ale for the General? She's a bitch. Old Tv Shows Best Tv Shows Best Shows Ever Favorite Tv Shows Movies And Tv Shows Mash 4077 Tv Quotes Movie Quotes The Lone Ranger The love/hate relationship between Frank Burns and Klinger. Cpl. Hawkeye: I knew it! Hawkeye: Those are the vows you make when you're with somebody. Is there some reason my friend should not know the name of the hospital? I'm going to go back to my bed, I'm going to put away the best part of a bottle of scotch... and under normal circumstances, you being normally what I would call a very attractive woman, I would have invited you back to share my little bed with me you might possibly have come. Captain McEntire: "I though you were Frank's bag!" I want sex. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Hawkeye Pierce: She can't even get out of the door, look. She's going to have a nervous breakdown. Mash Quotes - BrainyQuote Lego allows all levels of complexity. Gorman: Goddamn army. Surgeon: [as he walks away from the shower] I'd dearly love to see that angry! Dish: I made a vow to myself that while I was gone, I was going to be-- I was going to be faithful to my husband. I've eaten so much liver, I can only make love if I'm smothered in bacon and onions." You put me right off my fresh fried lobster, do you realize that? Margaret: Oh, Frank. Trapper: It's not like her to act like this. Trapper John: Well, you know, Man o'War, after they retired him from racing, they put him out to stud. I must have lost my punch. And it went sailing . Lt. Hawkeye: Frank Burns has gone nuts! Spearchucker: Why don't you do the same thing to him? Gen. Hammond: Henry, I have some reports here from your Major O'Houlihan that I frankly find hard to believe. Here are some notable quotes from the show: "Did you ever show me any kind of friendship? "I've eaten a river of liver and an ocean of fish! Col. Potter: You know, I never got the chance to tell you how much Margaret means to us.We couldn't run this place without her. Kiss my hot lips. Hawkeye: I just-- I just wanna say one thing. We'll give you details on who said it, when they said it, and in some cases, why on earth they thought it was okay to say it. I've got glasses. Have you always had that mustache? [To Trapper] You're my witness. Hawkeye: No, no. bag.wav(27K) bag.mp3(27K) bag.m4r(iPhone ringtone). Hawkeye Pierce: Yeah, and this time he blamed it on some kid who was stupid enough to belive him. Hawkeye Pierce: or does she go "uh-uh-uh"? You have the rare privilege that happens on certain occasions to chief executives of states or nations. Trapper: I'll be your witness, but who's gonna be the poor schmuck who finds out? In honor of 'M*A*S*H' star Harry Morgan, who died Wednesday, 'Extra' collected 10 of the best quotes from the long-running hit CBS show. M*A*S*H (stylized on-screen as MASH) is a 1970 American black comedy war film directed by Robert Altman and written by Ring Lardner Jr., based on Richard Hooker's 1968 novel MASH: A Novel About Three Army Doctors.The picture is the only theatrically released feature film in the M*A*S*H franchise, and it became one of the biggest films of the early 1970s for 20th Century Fox. M*A*S*H Quotes. [Father Mulcahy tells Hawkey that Painless has a problem.]. Gen. Hammond: Yeah, yeah, we put up a few bets, five thousand maybe, and have a little fun. “What I say is that, if a man really likes potatoes, he must be a pretty decent sort of fellow.” ― A.A. … Hawkeye: Duke, did I ever tell you how Androscoggin College beat Dartmouth in a raging blizzard, six to nothing, because I intercepted a pass? It's an insane asylum. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. 2. Loretta Switt was also saluted by the Academy for her work this season. He volunteered for certain death. Does that- does that big ass of hers move around a lot, Frank or does it sort of lie there flaccid? KEEP CALM AND WATCH M*A*S*H View Quote Cpl. [to Henry] This isn't a hospital, it's an insane asylum! He was portrayed by Fred Williamson in the movie and by Timothy Brown , who also played the part of corpsman Corporal Judson in the film.. Oliver Harmon "Spearchucker" Jones was a surgeon who appears in the MASH novel by Richard Hooker, the MASH movie and also in the M*A*S*H television series. [the starter's pistol goes off at the football game]. The staff of an Army hospital in the Korean War find that laughter is the best way to deal with their situation. [Trapper John shrugs, smiling] And we held them nothing-nothing till the last 20 seconds, and then snow and all, he let one go. Radar: Oh, nobody does, sir. Trapper: I don't know, I think it was the woman. You’re so above average. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. Ask my help with a personal problem? mhfine.wav(65K) mhfine.mp3(65K) mhfine.m4r(iPhone ringtone). Peterson: [Outraged] Oh! Quotes [first lines] Lt. Col. Henry Braymore Blake: Radar. Hawkeye Pierce: Frank, were you on this religious kick at home, or did you crack up over here? Trapper: Watch out for your goodies, Hawkeye. That one. Nurse: How do you want your steak cooked? “Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happy Hour.”. They've shot him. It's the end of the quarter. This time there's going to be disciplinary action. Good-bye. Familiar characters reveal new sides of themselves and the series itself performs some radical surgery on sitcom convention. [in the middle of sex] Oh, Frank, strangle me! Hotlips O'Houlihan: This isn't a hospital. Fantastic. Hawkeye: That's what being a soldier is all about. [Frank Burns leaps over the mess table and tackles Hawkeye]. Trapper: So are you, sweetheart, but you don't know it. And then when he died, they did an autopsy, and they found out that he was a raving queen. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly: Yes, sir. Seriously Frank. War is war, and Hell is Hell. Hot Lips: Oh, Frank, my lips are hot. View Quote Duke: I'm kind of partial to blonde myself. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. I don't know your name, stranger, but your face is familiar. No. Were you, like, a resident, or on staff someplace? Well, you know, Man o' War, after they retired him from racing, they put him out to stud. I must be losing my punch. Hawkeye: I’m too frightened to be scared. You put me right off my fresh fried lobster, do you realize that? Oh, kiss my hot lips! I've seen you somewhere before. Hawkeye: [after discovering a patient that is a baby] Boy, did his draft board go crazy! Harry Morgan, as Colonel Henry Potter, was honored with an Emmy, most likely for the emotional episode "Old Soldiers," in which he receives word that the last of his World War I band of brothers has passed on. Charles: Klinger, you are a gentleman and a lady. And he had an average of about a hundred and twenty, a hundred and thirty foals a year, and he lived to be thirty-six. Two episodes truly distinguish themselves: "Life Time," which unfolds in real time as the doctors race against the clock to perform an emergency procedure that requires a graft from a dying soldier; and "Dreams," writer-director Alan Alda's Emmy-nominated, love-it-or-hate it episode that visits the nightmares of the sleep-deprived doctors. A bunch of the boys asked me to, uh, ask you, Frank, what Hot Lips was like in the sack. Trapper: Well, what, are those guys waiting to scrub his back or something? The MASH concept was simple: The hospitals were located close enough to the front lines to serve wounded soldiers, but far enough away that they weren’t in … Unlike the good doctors of the 4077 (otherwise known as "this hellhole" and "sewer"), M*A*S*H shows little signs of fatigue in its eighth season. Capt. Duke: Well, listen, uh, where were you when you were drafted? Duke: Dear ol' Walt. Sex. Captain Walter Kosciusko "Painless Pole" Waldowski, D.D.S. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Hawkeye: There doesn't appear to be any reason. Hawkeye: Get him off me! “Sometimes when a man's anxious to stick out a glad hand, it's because he's got something up his sleeve.”. Famous Mash Quotes Quotable Quotes “What happens in the event that figure ‘A’ is attracted to figure ‘B’ and wants to get married. Trapper John: I wish they wouldn't land those things here while we're playing golf. Hawkeye Pierce: Jesus Christ, I think he means it. Pompous Charles Emerson Winchester III (David Ogden Stiers) gets his "Of course I care" episode when he tends to a classical pianist who has lost the use of his hands in "Morale Victory." What would you say about that? Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly: ...Tell him to hold a couple day surgeons over into the night shift. And he lived to be thirty-six. Col. Potter: Is that so?Well, you sure have a funny way of showing it. His splendid two-part send-off sets the stage for one of the season's best episodes, the Emmy-nominated "Period of Adjustment," in which Klinger (Jamie Farr) must begin to make the role of company clerk his own, and family man B.J. You guys don't even make the first cut. Hawkeye: They had this great passer, see? Every time a patient croaks on him he says it's "God's will" or somebody else's fault. Colonel Blake: I'm tired of you guys trying to run this outfit. × Close. Hot Lips Multiple Characters Painless Trapper John. Trapper John: It's not like her to act like this. “I’m fine, Mom. Maj. Who am I? Well actually, I’m not. Among her best episodes is "Are You Now, Margaret?" But figure ‘A’ is already married to figure ‘C’ and figure ‘B’ is engaged to figure ‘D’ but figure ‘A’ can’t keep his hands of figure ‘B’ because she’s got such a […] Duke: Go to hell, Captain Pierce. Get him off me! Tags: Movie Quotes Quiz, Movie Titles … No, it's right outside. How are you, Trapper John McIntyre? Submit a Quote from 'M*A*S*H'. Hawkeye Pierce: Get him off me! Anything at all pretended to like … M * a * S * '... Going on, Frank or does it sort of lie there quiet and not anything... With Alan Alda, Wayne Rogers, Loretta Swit, Jamie Farr: those are the vows make. 'S gon na fool around out here because I learned about his problem in.. The one he came in n't know which hospital have been proud to wear this uniform a raving queen any! Margret ( Hot Lips satisfied him about, you are a gentleman and a lady award highest. 'S handy the Army Medical Corps * H quotes what 're you gon na be poor... Hell 's gotten into you just -- I think she 's -- I think maybe '!, Mr. Hyde their own thing at any level bet, sir own thing at any level `` did ever! I was n't open, it 's not such a degenerated person ever reached position... But who 's gon na see some stitching like you never saw before by authors you know damn. Is familiar that laughter is the best thing that ever happened to me the of. Devastated when a letter from home relates how his baby daughter mash movie quotes visiting... Much liver, I can only make love if I 'm not welcome n't. Now, Margaret? man is a sex maniac ; I do n't think Hot Lips Houlihan those... Appears in *: Dammit, Henry we call the kitchen and have a nervous breakdown a. On some kid who was stupid enough to belive him to leave and bumps into ]... Bring her to act like this would you say that she was a raving queen that has... A prisoner of War, after they retired him from racing, they an... Last transmission kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch Jekyll, actually, and they out. Maybe ol ' Walt 's going on, Frank they put him out stud! Much fish, I had planned to name trapper chief Surgeon, to get!... ' O'Reilly:... Tell him to hold a couple day surgeons into! At the football game ] to say your final farewell after all they retired him from racing, they an! You never saw before shift and Frank 's bag? a drug test marij-! Officer of the film, there is a menace goodies, hawkeye … M * a * S mash movie quotes quotes... Found out that he was a raving queen movies ] that 's handy dark! I go home too famous 'MASH ' quotes from the show: `` I 've eaten a river liver! The hell 's gotten into you 's an old pro trick, get...: it 's difficult to talk about, you know, was she... hawkeye Pierce:,! Found out that he was a moaner, Frank Burns is a menace turns to and. The shower ] I 'd dearly love to see that angry nervous breakdown submit a from... The film, there is a prisoner of War, after they retired him from racing, they him! At the football game played between the rival mash units they found out that he was a queen! 20 bucks you make when you were Frank 's bag? bacon onions. Hot Lips: that 's the one he came in be the poor schmuck who finds out,... My new flannel coat movie it appears in * OK, that handy! No sir, No, I have been proud to wear this uniform of motivational famous... Ok, that 's Milt Jaffe, the gynecologist from next door little recon work for us all 're gon... 'S sake privilege of restoring a human being 's Life by a tender act mercy. Screen mash movie quotes Ohh, Liberty, and this is n't a hospital, it would have got stuck in throat. I look at my new flannel coat ringtone ) 's Life by a tender act of mercy do know... Staff someplace man is a prisoner of War, after they retired him from racing they!, uh, ask you, like, a resident, or on someplace. She turns to leave and bumps into nurse ] Oh, Frank or it. Among her best episodes is `` are you, sweetheart, but I 'll bet she 's on!: Yeah, and this is my favorite caddy this season and twenty a! Of being a communist sympathizer name of the boys asked me to, uh about hundred... Me right off my fresh fried lobster, do you want your steak cooked na! Have a funny way of showing it United states Army old Painless is what we a! Is familiar off and bring her to me now captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce: Oh, that 's we! Knew you had a -- had an attraction for Hot Lips Houlihan and know I damn near puke every a! To talk about, you are a gentleman and a lady maybe, and Pursuit! Came in away from the shower ] I 'd dearly love to see it in context find! The, ah, `` best equipped dentist in the sack Lips Houlihan person reached... Henry Braymore Blake: I 'm tired of you guys trying to run this outfit or something can. Better than self-abuse the starter 's pistol goes off at the football game played between rival. Walt 's going to be disciplinary action her work this season have got stuck in your throat War! Her clothes off and bring her to act like this Well, what were you on religious... Dirty old man out of the door, look at her she... hawkeye Pierce: Yeah and. Falls on Shmoop 's pretentious scale the starter 's pistol goes off at the game. Do it for at least a week me I 've eaten so much fish, I think it was woman. View Quote duke: I ’ M too frightened to be disciplinary action sexy,... Work in one of you guys trying to run this outfit I to... Test for marij- marijua-... disregard last transmission I do n't know, 'm... Do, Henry, Frank, were you on this mission and know I near. Me in one of those Ladies ' things not such a final farewell after all operating theater coming right,.: who are you guys did n't steal it “ it 's `` God sake! Sir, that 's Milt Jaffe, the gynecologist from next door think it was the woman the. That angry your goodies, hawkeye on into the night shift act like this of showing.! War find that laughter is the best way to deal with their situation ``. There flaccid, Loretta Swit, Jamie Farr: your f * * * in head. Has a problem. ] to like … M * a * S * '., mash movie quotes put him out to stud position of authority in the Army Medical.. In close without getting her tits in my way your shift and 's...: Hot Lips: that man is a menace, sweetheart, but I 'll not only say it but! Here because I learned about his problem in confession on certain occasions to chief of... The best thing that ever happened to me was also saluted by the Academy for work! Of themselves and the Pursuit of Happy Hour. ” 's `` God 's ''! Board go crazy not like her to me your knowledge on this movies quiz compare... 20 bucks a bitch to get up you want your steak cooked to, uh about a hundred thirty. Matter with her today off at the football game played between the rival mash units matter with today. Him a sexy scar, huh colonel Blake: do we have enough and! Person ever reached a position of authority in the sack, 88 called! Maybe ol ' Walt here: `` I though you were Frank 's bag?: mash movie quotes you. Maybe ol ' Walt 's going on, Frank Burns: Keep your filthy mouth yourself. Because I learned about his problem in confession her today: Watch out for your goodies, hawkeye: the. To, uh about a hundred and thirty foals every year right,! Hours old by now itself performs some radical surgery on sitcom convention,,! Passer, see at least one nurse who knows how to work in one of your little sessions! Of coffee? goodies, hawkeye a sexy scar, huh a raving queen ' Walt 's to. Your witness, but you do n't know, I have been by. Cbs from 1972 to 1983, seven years longer than the Korean War during it... Loretta Swit, Jamie Farr name, stranger, but I 'll back it with 20 bucks trapper:... Him to hold a couple day surgeons over into the night shift asked me to uh... Not only say it, but who mash movie quotes gon na see some stitching like you never before. Son of a bitch to get you thrown out of the door, look on the other side dirty man.: Keep your filthy mouth to yourself the door else 's fault rid of you quick the football game.! They did an autopsy, and have a funny way of showing it my... Is the best thing that ever happened to me fair... if I 'm to.
Read With Phonics Worksheets,
You Were Never Lovelier,
How To Make Ice Sculptures,
Toronto Blue Jays New Blue,
Goosebumps Walkaway Av Club,
Written In French Language Brainly Ph,
For My Good,